We are often told to love our bodies. For many people the gap between self-loathing and self-love is too great to take in one stride. Let’s think of it in steps instead: we can move daily self-hate into less frequent self-hate. One trick is to schedule our self-hate. Whenever it comes up when we see ourselves in a mirror we can say the following to ourselves: now is not the time for self-hate. We have scheduled that for tomorrow at 7 pm. At the allotted time actually show up for your self-hate session. You are not allowed to do anything else during that time. While this may sound strange what we are doing is confining our self-hate to a narrow slot in time.
“What would it sound like if I felt neutral about my body?” Your next step is to become like Switzerland: neutral to the core. If this is too hard ask instead: “what does someone sound like who neither hates nor loves themselves?”. If you want you can decorate your mirror with Swiss flags or pictures of cheese to keep you on track.
The next step would be to ask: “what would someone sound like who accepts themselves?” They don’t have to think they are stunningly beautiful but okay with what they are. Try to be accepting of yourself for ten seconds, the thirty and then a minute.
Your body is a great instrument to teach you self-acceptance and maybe even self-love. Use it.
Tomorrow we will talk about constructive comparison.