Do you often use phrases like ‘first-world-problem’ or ‘in other countries people have nothing and are happier although their problems are tougher than mine’ or some variation of that?
Admittedly taking a look at what other people are going through can provide some helpful perspective. However perspective is not helpful if you use it to negate your suffering. It’s not helpful if you use it to undermine the validity of your feelings or somehow think, that you should be over those feelings already.
Sure if you are reading this is it likely that you have not been caught in the middle of some horrendous humanitarian disaster however that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t take your sorrows seriously. Chances are that the things you worry about are pretty universal fears:
- fear of rejection
- fear of losing something or someone
- fear of the future
- fear of death
Don’t use the weapon of perspective to belittle yourself. That will not make you wiser or more resilient. Self-compassion will.