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When someone says that what you want to do cannot be done what they are really saying, is that they can’t do it. When they say, something is not going to happen in the world, it means that they don’t believe in it enough to work on making it happen. Based on my experience it next to never has anything to do with what either the world or you is capable of.
We all do these things that we know take away from our happiness yet they are addictive. For me it’s reading the comments section after I read an article or watched a movie I liked. It’s a no-win situation: those who share my joy are never as expressive as the people who have to spew negativity for no good reason at all. So what’s yours? If your masochistic habit is connected to sexual masochism good for you. You are having more fun then the rest of us with our one stupid habit 😉
At a writing Meetup I listened to an excerpt that went something like this:
“I like the Harry Potter movies better than the books. When I was younger it was the opposite. I think the books make you feel the emotions much more, you have to be more empathetic and it’s just so much work.”
This made me sad for them not only because they had clearly lost the ability to enjoy one of the most awesome series in the history of literature. When exactly does feeling emotions go from something that is exciting and sought after to being something that we avoid because it’s too much work? No kid pauses to think whether to play or not because they could get too emotional. And while teenagers are of course keen on avoiding certain emotions like embarrassment they are still open to feeling a whole range of feelings, often within a the same day.
It also reminded me of something I had heard on an entrepreneur podcast a while back: “building a business is frightening because as an adult you are just used to having a stable emotional life. Once the teenage years are over you kind of settle emotionally too. As entrepreneurs you suddenly rediscover all those scary emotions.”
Fortunately I never went through this process quite the same way. Have you? Have you stopped feeling hard since you were young? If that’s the case how do you expect to get in touch with all the wonderfulness of life? How can we expect to feel fully emotionally engaged with life if we shy away from the “work of empathy”?
We cannot be more sensitive to pleasure without being more sensitive to pain.-Alan Watts
People don’t refuse change. They refuse being changed.
Especially at work we want to become more and more efficient. It’s a great goal to have. We just have to make sure, that we don’t automate something that is flawed from the start.
You and I do it every day: read or listen to things we agree with. Exchange views with people who agree with us. Those are the inputs we often enjoy the most. Let’s keep in mind though, that consuming information that we and everybody we know agree with is not very conducive to expansion. Actually it makes us vulnerable to all kinds of bubbles and misconceptions. Imagine a group of 50 people and they were only allowed to have babies with each other. Wouldn’t turn out that well after a while. So let’s not create inbred idea babies but bring in some fresh blood by talking to people who are not like us and reading things nobody we know has ever recommended.