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Okay so you want to be non-judgmental. You understand that it’s a tool and it doesn’t mean you can never have an opinion about things ever again. But how does it work?
- Trust that the world can go on without your opinion
- Start small
- Postpone if you struggle
- Enjoy the space and freedom
Awareness: look out for preferences and opinions. While you want to have an opinion about what your toddler is allowed to stick his finger in other things are not important at all.
Remind yourself that you don’t need to let your brain eat up space about things that don’t matter. Alternatively if they matter a great deal remind your brain, that if it waits a bit longer to come to a decision vital information that would otherwise be overlooked can be used.
Start small. Don’t try to be impartial about politics or religion the first time round. Start small with things that really make no difference to your lfie. Gently remind yourself that nothing bad will happen if you don’t make up your mind about this topic.
If you find it hard to stop making judgments simply defer them. Say to yourself: I can make up my mind about this in 20 minutes, tomorrow or next week. However in the remaining time make a commitment to understand something about the issue that you are not seeing right now. Then permit yourself to make up your mind it if the need is still there, but only after the time has passed.
Once we learn about the things we would have missed otherwise or we suddenly start to get the hang of not judging every little thing we can enjoy the fruits of being non-judgmental.