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Lots of toupets are ridiculously obvious to the rest of the world and only serve to fool the wearer into the idea that nobody is noticing, when in fact, everybody is noticing the precise thing this unfortunate guy is trying to cover up. But curiously, as Tim Kreider puts it, the people around us often don’t give a damn about the thing that we are trying to cover up and that is the cause of so much shame and pain for us. He says that we all wear toupets on our soul, desperately trying to cover something up, that is obvious to everyone around us. What makes it bad is not the issue itself but the lies and shame we build around it.